I Felt Less Than a MAN: Hernia Surgery, Why Men Don't Dance & Republican Friends? | Ep. 14

New set, built with these hands

0:25Welcome to the Black and Victorious podcast. I am black. I'm victorious. But I'm also victorious. I'm also very black. What's up with you, dog? We out here. All the time we out here. You already know what it is. Living our best life. Yay. New set who this. Newstead who this. You know what I'm saying? New set hoods. Newstead who this. It's us. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Build this joint. Build this. With these hands. These hands. Handsy.

0:53Got handsy. Black hand.

0:56White and creamy.

0:58Nope. Nope. Nope.

1:01Yeah, he be having me rolling.

1:03Yeah, cuz it's

Guilty pleasures: what Instagram keeps showing us

1:04funny, though.

1:04Now what's some stupid stuff on Instagram that you be looking at? It's like a guilty pleasure, yeah?

1:10Uh guilty pleasure, stupid stuff.

1:14I mean, uh. You ain't locked into nothing, like nothing. Like, you know, not just one particular thing. It's just a multiple. It's just a multitude of things that you that you look at. Like, for instance, for me, I think I spoke to you about this before. I be looking at like uh cow hooves, like how they Yeah, I know it's crazy. What? But how they like trim cows' feet, cow hooves. Okay. You know what I'm saying? When they have like when they when they're lame, you know, and and they have like some kind of infection. Uh-huh. And so they go in to try to find an infection, you know, by trimming the feet. This comes up on your it's constantly on there now. Dang. It's constantly on it because it's gratifying to me.

2:04So I'm gonna keep it a bean, young. The reason why I think I'm struggling is I have been trying to uh get off of Instagram as much. Okay. So I uh I only go on Instagram to check my homies who send me memes.

2:20Okay.

2:20But I I rarely scroll. I rarely like so I I think my algorithm, but I will tell you this. I don't know if this happens for you, but this happens for me.

2:29What?

2:30If somebody, if you looking at a reel and you press the like, say for example, a reel is in somebody's story. Yes, and you press to watch the entire reel, it will literally preview the next reel before watching my the reel that I've actually clicked on. Did this happen to you? No, this doesn't happen to me. I I think I got a glitch.

2:51Yeah, it sounds like a glitch because I've never heard this shit before.

2:54Yeah, something's up. Something's up. And every time the preview, yeah. Naked woman. Oh, naked women, not naked, but you know what I'm saying? Every time my preview is like some girl.

3:05You can't escape butts on Instagram. It's but the butts are everywhere on Instagram. Dog, it is ridiculous. On social media in general, you just can't escape it. It's just butts everywhere. Butts everywhere. And now it's AI butts. It's AI butts and everything.

3:18AI butts is crazy. Yeah. AI butts is crazy. And I'm like, dog, why? But I'm like, dog, this is the thing about being a heterosexual man who's attracted to women, right? Like, you see the butt. You I don't like the butt. I never like, never double tap a butt.

3:35But oh, you said, oh, okay. I just wanted to make sure you was clear. You said you don't like the butt meaning. I don't like you don't tap on it. I don't double tap the butt.

3:44Okay, okay, I got you. So, but you can't not, it's like it look at it. Yeah. So Instagram works, like it looks at like how much you look at the butt particular, or how long it can keep your attention. Yeah. But if you see a butt, you like, like, hey, a butt. A butt. Yeah. Like yeah, like how do you scroll past the butt? Like, you know what I'm saying? It's extremely and that young, I swear, young, it be blowing me, young. And then once you look, I get that. I'm like, young, what do you like? You know you just you you you thirst trapping for no reason.

4:19It's not for no reason. They know what they're doing. Yeah, but I'm like, You know what I'm saying? They know exactly what they're doing. It be job, yeah, yeah, you can't escape it, man.

4:27I want to escape it. Do I how do you I like what do you do?

4:31What can you do? I don't know what you can do. Like you can,

Fixing your algorithm (books, recipes, turtles)

4:34you can you can start clicking on things that are more interesting to you, and that will decrease it. Yeah, it won't eliminate it.

4:44I'm glad you said that. Because though the stuff that I'm not looking at is weird, this is about to be real weird. Cause I know you're gonna have jokes about it. But uh, I've been trying to like more books. Okay. Like people who talk about books, so I've been getting a lot more people who recommend books on my feed. Okay. Uh I also recipes, I get recipes a lot.

5:03Okay.

5:03Uh, and I also get gym stuff. So I got like when I when we get back in the gym, because we've been out of the gym because my hernia. Yeah. But well, I don't know. I guess me and you having this conversation, but I just yeah. Well, we could talk about that in a second.

5:16But um But why what what did you get to the weird part yet? The part that you see I was supposed to see was gonna be. It's not weird.

5:24Nah, it's not in terms of it.

5:25Are you sure? You sure? Like, are you leaving something out? Like it's some kind of stuff, like Nah, bro. I it ain't oh you know what I mean. I like turtles. Okay, turtles.

5:35I wish more turtles would come up on my feed.

5:37Dog is this joint where this dude be feeding, he got a a big pit bull, and he feed them like like like like crazy, like uh uh uh a duck's heart. Uh uh Oh, I've seen that.

5:50Yeah.

5:50Yeah, yeah, yeah.

5:51And you see which you see which one he eat? Yeah, which ones he eat first and last and all that.

5:56Yeah, but he eat he's gonna eat all of it.

5:58He's gonna eat it all.

5:59I don't understand. Like they they I've seen that before. What is the taste buzz? Because they just like they just swallow. Like you, I'm just saying, dog. They they chomp like two times and then it's all gone. Yeah, I'm gonna do that. And that's it got bones in it.

6:14It's a dog.

6:14I'm like, come on, dog. You gotta you gotta come on, dog. He's a dog. Yeah, man, but god damn, like enjoy the taste of it. Like, dog, they don't it's not cooked. It's not cooked. It's not cooked, but if he doesn't like something, he doesn't eat it. So he eat all of it. Well, no, it was just one, this one dude, he tried to feed a uh, I guess it's it's condensed blood, uh-huh, a block of condensed blood,

Vic's hernia surgery: "I can't lift anything"

6:39and he just wouldn't eat it. He bit it once, and then he was like, oh nah. And so he kept trying to put it in front of us.

6:45Yeah, my timeline be, you know what I'm saying? It's it, yeah. It's crazy. I'm trying to stay away from it, man.

6:51Yeah, I be saying gym stuff too. Yeah, yeah, gym stuff be interesting.

6:55Yeah, the gym, dog. I've been blown, dog. Yeah, I've been blown recovering from this this this surgery, dog. I've been blown, bruh.

7:04Well what do you you what are you blown about?

7:08My routine. Bro, I can't do nothing, dog. Like, I'ma tell you this. I went to the CBC, um, and I was at the CBC, and I had my company, I had a table at the CBC. Um, you know what I'm saying? Getting folks never stop learning. Yeah. Never stop learning. So I had a table, but I had a rack. So the stuff that I bring in for my table is light. I had a few bags, you know what I'm saying? Light bags, you know what I mean? A book bag, a little junk for my cups that I give away to people, and like, oh, you know what I'm saying, my little stand. Bro, I can't lift anything over 10 pounds. I can't lift nothing. So if I lift it, I feel it. You know what I'm saying? As I'm recovering, you should like it.

7:48What does it feel like? Well, first of all, like what did you what did what happened?

7:53So I I had hernia. Like a hernia is like a pretty much just a like a I I guess a hole, like a a hole in your stomach to some degree. Like when you like when you lift stuff. I don't really know what a hernia actually is, but I just know that like it has to be repaired. Like you gotta like put your cause you like part of your like I guess stomach can come out or something like that. Okay. That's what a hernia, it's like a little little hole. Mine was small, and you know, having a wife, you you she was like, You gonna get this fixed. Cause it wasn't really bothering me. It wasn't bothering me on a day to day. It's just certain things.

8:39Yeah, certain core exercises now, I think you was cool because your stomach was was damn near flat. But you know what I'm saying? What you mean? Like I said, you all of this time, you've been cool. Like the other day you called me dog and was like, look, young, we get in the gym, we're gonna start doing some core exercises. And I was, although I was like, young, this is great. I was jaw blown, yeah. Because I've been trying to do core exercises this whole time, but you couldn't do it because of your hernia. And now, now that you done got it fixed, you feel like you're getting the little, like a little pudge then. Nah.

9:11That's not why, that's not why I said it. That's not what I said. I'm actually losing weight. I done lost all this weight because.

9:17Yeah, but you said what you said.

9:19I see, there we go. There you go. I said we gotta, because I'm starting to realize how much of our movements is the core. So like I can't, like, everything that you do is your core because when I'm like repairing from surgery, like I feel my my my my stomach all the time. Like I can't like lifting your leg or like twisting or like lift this, lift this something up. A lot of times you think you're lifting something up with your arm, but nah, dog, like it's all here. You can't that's why I can't lift anything. I can't lift nothing because it engages my core. And like I've I've realized that like I think that that is the foundation of strength. Like, you got a strong core, you good, you good to go. And so that's why we're gonna work on our core more, yeah. All right, dog. Does it hurt when you fought? Uh first few days, you couldn't, I couldn't do nothing. I could yeah, bruh. The pain,

The pain nobody warned him about

10:10bruh, bruh. I feel like my surgeon under uh stated the the pain. Like, bruh, the first two two that couple days, dog, bruh, you can't I couldn't cough, you can't sneeze, you can't get excited. Like, bruh, it was the some of the most intense pain. And it lasts. It was like, you know how sometimes you get a pain and it's just like boom, and it's like, ah, that hurt. This pain was like, I'm gonna stay here for like 30, 45 seconds. It hurt so bad you couldn't cry. It was just like I just gotta just hold on tight. Just you know what I'm saying, and wait for the pain that's to like kind of go through. So now I'm I'm better. I'm like, I'm moving through, I'm moving into my second week. So it, I, you know what I mean? I got a different look.

10:57So what they what did they put something inside of you? Or did like what did they do? What did they do? Because I'm assuming if you had a hole, they had to cover it up with something or they had to like bring it together.

11:10The the surgery I had, they they have to uh they put like a to close it up, they put like a mesh in there to like, you know what I'm saying, kind of sort of thing.

11:19Like like like like like like a wave cap type material type joint. So you so you got you got a wave cap, you got you got you got some stockers, you got some stockers around your stomach.

11:35Yeah, I guess, yeah.

11:36I I guess that's what it is, yeah. I got like I got a wave cap in there. Wave cap got like a little it's tight, yeah. Got pantyhose. Yeah, dog, but yeah, it got I had the uh yeah I'm I'm sliced and I got it fixed, though. I'm slice and now I'm on the I'm on the on the other side of it, you know what I'm saying?

11:55Me too, because I think that stopped you. No, it didn't stop you from running.

11:59That didn't stop you from running, it just stopped me from doing certain court exercises, yeah. You know what I'm saying? But I feel like now I'm about to go hard.

12:05Okay.

12:06Cause they say it's like a 98% chance it won't happen again. I'm about to go hard, dog.

12:10What does that mean? What does like it's because you say it to me like it's a threat. You know what I'm saying? I only like the way you're saying it.

12:18Yeah, I mean, all these jokes you got, we're gonna pay like when I when my joint, when I'm ready, bruh, we going hard, bro.

12:24Well, first of all, you gotta recover. It's not like you just gonna come right back, like you, you, you getting, you know what I'm saying? You losing your muscle right now, you know what I'm saying? You you ain't had to yeah, you ain't even had to say that. I'm just saying, you you ain't had to point that out. You threatening them, you threatening me, and now I'm telling you, hey, slow down, little kid. Like slow down, little kid. You gotta get your energy back.

12:49That's all good. I'm gonna be back.

12:51It's all good. I respect it. I'm gonna be back, though. When I get back, you know what I'm saying? I'm going hard, I'm getting back, but I'm I'm gonna take it slow. I'm I'm gonna

Feeling helpless: a Black woman carried my bags

12:58I'm gonna move in, I'm gonna guide in, you know what I'm saying? I'm gonna listen to my body. Yeah, but you know what I'm saying, but I'm telling you, dog, like you can, I understand how people can get quickly into like a I don't know if it's depression, yes, or like be bruh, like yeah, you're I'm not saying I'm depressed at all, but like the routine, bruh, like just being feeling helpless. Like I was going into the CBC, and that's why I the story I was telling, bruh. Like, I couldn't lift anything. So, but I look like an able, I can walk, like you see me, I look able-bodied, but I'm like taking the stuff on my car. I'm like, bruh, I need help. Like, I had to go to people, like humble myself, like, dog, I need help taking this upstairs. I get I get to the elevator, the brother helped me take it to the elevator. He, the brother who was working the door, he helped me take a couple of things on the elevator. He was like, but bruh, I can't go upstairs because I got to man my post, right? So I get on the elevator and his sister get on the elevator with me, right? Black woman get on the elevator, yeah, and I got all this stuff, like just sitting on my at my foot, and I and I'm on the elevator, I'm like, sis, I I can't lift it. I can't lift anything. And the black woman, she looked at me, she's like, You need help? And I was like, She made you say it. Yes, I said, I need help. I need help. And I was like, I'm sorry, I just had surgery, and it's just and so this sister helped me take the stuff off the elevator and put it to the side, and then I could only carry this very little box, it's like little brown box. She grabbed like two or three of my things, and I had and I had to walk side by side with this black woman.

14:33And she was carrying heavy loads, and you got this little box. Bruh.

14:39Damn.

14:40Bruh, yo, we need to talk about this. You know what I mean? Yeah, that is that that's that has to feel like tore me up.

14:48Tore me up, but the bla but did but this the power of black women though. Tore me up, and I'm sitting here walking alongside her. I was like, dog, I was I and I was telling her, I was like, yeah, I feel so bad right now. Like that you are caring. And she looked at me, she said, she said, black man, like, receive this

Gender roles are embedded in us

15:06help. Like, I had no idea who this woman is, right? Like, she was just and she looked at me, she was like, receive this help. And I it was just it was so hard, dog.

15:15That's interesting, dog, because you know, we've had conversations about gender roles before. Yeah, and it's evident that that is embedded in us or in you specifically, bruh, but also like in me. Like, I I would feel bad if I'm walking. I even feel if I'm walking, if I'm going somewhere and I see a young man with his mother, and the mother's carrying the load, I'm going to him like, hey, Slim. Yeah, grab that. Grab that. Yeah.

15:46Grab that. Like my wife had to take the trash out. She had to take the trash up to the to the front. I was like, bruh. I couldn't, like, I can't. Young. It's a different, it's a it put it's a different pull.

16:01And you know, do do okay. I was hurt. What are some things that women may have like that?

16:11I don't know, bruh. I don't know, bruh.

16:15Like, what what what can a woman like not be able to do because of some kind of medical condition or something at the moment, and it makes her feel less of a woman?

16:29I don't know. I mean, I I I truly, I know I've had conversations with my wife, and she said that she feels like if the house is not in order, like if the she's I she said this to me, like if if if like the house isn't clean, yeah, or something like that, that she feels responsible for it. She feels like though it's like a it's like a it's a it's a house responsibility, and I think that that is it is a house responsibility, because like I c clean that house too, but she said if it if at ever it feels like it, she feels the the load. And I don't feel that. I don't feel like the load of that. You know what I'm saying? Though I clean a house because I just want to be clean, I think the judgment she feels like will hit her. But I don't know if that's the same thing.

17:17Like I it's not because I I don't I was sitting in my mind, like I don't think it's the same thing because like you will never like she she'll never carry anything heavy in your presence if you're right there and you're capable, you're willing, by the way. Oh yeah, yeah. Yeah, so that'll never happen. Whereas she can be in the house and you will clean. Yeah, you know what I'm saying?

17:40And oh yeah, yeah, yeah. You see what I'm saying?

17:42Like it's it's it's it's there's there's not it's not the same.

17:45Yeah, that that is a yeah, that's a very ill feeling. Like I was hurt, bruh. I was hurt. Like I actually went to f like

Is a man's worth tied to what he can do?

17:53gave her a shirt, was like, I felt like hey, thank you. Like, you know what I'm saying? I yeah, yeah, that that that has been that has been the toughest part for me. Uh is is being is having to rely and feeling like I, you know, there's things that I can't do.

18:13So when I ruptured my Achilles, I was out for some months and I felt like I was entering into a state of depression because you know I couldn't do for myself and others had to do for me. So I I totally understand. But once again, is that a man thing? Do you think that that only happens to this level with men? Cause I because I've I've spoken to multiple people who have like injuries that take them out for a significant amount of time and they they express like this kind of thing.

18:57So I don't yeah, I don't know if it's only us, but I do know that a lot of times like our worth oftentimes is caught up in our ability to do. Like this idea that like men can't relax, like we don't like, yeah, you know, that the the the little funny thing that's kind of go goes around the internet is that like when a man relaxes, it feels like men are not supposed to chill or just kind of kinda be. And I think that part of that is is centered around that, like our ability to be like we don't feel like men if we're not producing or doing something or or contributing.

19:38Is it that we don't feel like men or is it we don't feel like they feel like we are men?

19:49You have me thinking about perception and when that sister was carrying my stuff in, I felt like I wasn't that effective. Yes, I think it's both

Shame: "I couldn't watch my wife lift the suitcase"

20:06because if somebody see me, just like you saw, like you was talking about that boy with his mother, yes, see me carrying this little box, then perception is that what type of can I do to see? Yeah, I went to yeah, and so I feel I feel like less than a man, and me not being able to do it, I feel less than a man. Yeah, because we my wife and I went to a hotel that same weekend, and we had to get the bag, the the suitcase out of the the trunk. And I couldn't get it out. I couldn't grant and she had to grant, I literally made it like I turned around and like I couldn't watch it.

20:45Yeah, yo, that's interesting, dog.

20:48That's that's yeah, so like I I literally changed like turned my head or or had to do something else. So I would I couldn't like Yeah, shame written all over you. Shame. That is shame. Yes. That's that I don't know. It it might be a pro and a con, right? Like this idea, I'm not saying that it's all bad because I think that that is part part of our contribution, right? I don't I don't think that it's necessarily a bad thing to want to contribute in that way, but I think that when we are not allowed, or when we are not able to do it, for you know, whatever, like I has surgery. Yeah, like we gotta be able to be able to move through that in a way, yeah, accept it, and not feel like lesser, less lesser, yeah. Or be or or you can feel it and just be able to go through it because that's the piece that I think was important.

21:49Yeah, because I don't think there's no way that you're not gonna feel it.

21:52Yeah, because if it's part of your identity, it's part it's part of my identity, you know what I'm saying? And so, yeah, but yeah, it's been a struggle, bro. It's been A struggle to say the least, you know what I'm saying? Been a struggle, dog. And I, you know, part of it is, you know, I I'm I'm I'm getting my boogie back though. I'm being able to like start

Line dancing is Black culture

22:10to dance again, you know what I'm saying? I can like stand up on one leg, you know what I mean, and like kind of get my boogie on. I was I was at the CBC too, and they was uh playing uh line dances. You know what I'm saying? Like, you know, all of the line dances and all that, like and I was thinking like, dang, young, that is such a black thing, yo.

22:31That only like not only we we make it cool. We make it cool. Oh yeah, but they all They got the little docy dough and all that type of stuff. It's all that's line dancing.

22:43Oh yeah. It is line dancing, it is it's just different.

22:47Yeah, it's just yeah.

22:49But then but but we also, but nah, but we got what we do have though is we have black dances. Yes. We got dances that's just ours. That's that's true. Are there other people who got like I mean?

23:03I said the doce dough. So I think the doce do is uh uh a a white dance, but I don't know for sure. I think they probably do, but they're like little they name the whole thing. You know what I'm saying? Like they'll have a a whole like uh routine.

23:24Oh yes, I mean we have those two like routine dances, like like design, like root, like what are you talking about though? So like we have like line like uh hand dancing, right? Hand dancing is a type of dance, but I don't know if it's a black dance, but I think it is, it might be, but anyway, there's hand dancing about it. But then there's like the Dougie.

23:44Right. And then there's like stinky leg.

23:47The stanky leg. You know what I'm saying? Right? The uh cabbage patch. Yeah, yeah.

23:53You I feel like you don't know your your dances because you just got me. You just got stuck around. The hee-haw. Yeah. Yeah, the hee-haw. The running man. The running man, the uh the butterfly. Yeah, the cabbage patch. Roger Rabbit. The okay, okay. The uh you already said Dougie. You said stanky leg.

24:13Um punished you. All right, so nah, it don't matter. I won. I was the last one. Here's the question though, young. Alright. Are there any black dances that you've always wanted to know how to do, but you can't get it right?

24:28The Tamir joint. The Tamiya joint thrash you. Yes, I mean I just said that I can't.

24:34Ah yeah, you can't do it, but guess who can, dog? Guess who can? Catch me at the cookout.

24:41Yeah, you put a tutorial of put on YouTube and just like it. Shout out to Chevy.

24:46Shout out to Chevy, y'all. Chevy at the Morgan State University alumni event. Chevy taught everybody how to do that, John. Shout out to Chevy.

24:52Like, you did you had your whole little, I ain't had that.

24:55So yeah, I'm just saying, I know how to do that, John.

24:59That's cool.

24:59Yeah, I'm but not line dances. Okay, so line dance, you don't know about that's the only line dance you don't know how to do? I don't know how to do the uh the with them fans at a joint. Oh, you know how to do that too? Yeah, and you know what I'm upset about? Bamma's when the fans out, you know what I'm saying? When the fans that, you know what I'm saying, everybody act like it's just a girl dance. It seemed like it. Nah, just cause I don't got no fan. I ain't I ain't but I'm gonna do the little. I'm gonna do that.

25:23They be sticking their butt out. They they they you be doing.

25:26You doing that, you shouldn't have to do that. Nah, I'll be like, you gotta do a cool. You'll be like, I don't know, yeah.

25:31I'ma tell you something about line. What you what? What I'm saying is the way that they be, they they be doing the little part right there. Yeah, is the same kind of stance. I'd be like, yeah.

25:44Hey yeah.

25:46Get that together. Hey yeah. Yeah. Hey yeah. Yeah.

25:53Hey um, yeah, you gotta believe, yeah. Your poses be wild, yeah. Yeah, my poses be wild. I don't be moving. I know you don't know, but I know. I appreciate it though.

26:02I don't but look, I don't know. Fix your stuff. You be like, yeah, stop standing like that. Like a bad.

26:09I don't care, dog. That's my problem. Yeah, I don't care about nothing, dog. I just be out here. But listen, so it's interesting you say that. Dang, you know, you made me lose my train of thought.

26:19You said the the the uh fan dance,

Bring back the Electric Boogie Woogie Woogie

26:22is it just for for they be?

26:23No, yeah, that's what I'm talking about. So, like the line dances, right? When a line dance comes on, whether it be the wobble, you know what I'm saying? Uh the whatever them jumps are cupid shuffle, cuba shuffle, whatever, right? I felt like when I was young, when the electric slide was out, I feel like they need to, I feel like the electric slide needed, they need to when they retire. No, they need to bring it back. They need to bring the electric shuffle.

26:47Electric boogie woogie woogie. I'm like, dog, I feel like they don't play the boogie woogie woogie no more.

26:51I mean, I I feel like you can I think the electric slide was like the the inaugural one, right? So because of that, we can just like we do the electric slide to everything. No, every song. We don't need the boogie woogie woogie song to do the electricity.

27:06Nah, dog, I feel like DJs need to bring Boogie Woogie Woogie back because it is like, it's the way, it's the intro into how everybody gets into line dancing. And this is my point too. Electric Boogie Woogie Woogie, right? Right? Did you do the boogie woogie woogie?

27:23What you mean?

27:24When you was a kid. When you was young, not even a kid, because I'm sure you was, oh, you probably was an adult when Boogie Woogie Woogie came out.

27:29I did I did the electric slide.

27:31Everybody did the electric slide.

27:33Yeah, everybody still does the electric slide.

27:36I feel like there's less men doing line dances.

27:38I would agree. That's what I'm saying. I think that there's less men dancing. I'm like, why? I don't know. What's the problem? It's still, I still think it's a perception thing. I don't like it.

27:52Yeah.

27:52Because when line dancer comes on, I feel I'm I'm a dance. We was just somewhere. We was uh in Atlanta. Yeah. And the line dance came on at the little meet and greet. And I was the only man out there with the, you know what I'm saying, the elder sisters. I was doing the junk with them. The meet and greet. Yeah, the meet and greet. The little it was a little meet and greet. See, you were sitting down, not me. What meet and greet you talking about? Dog, the meet and greet. Dog in Atlanta with meet.

28:17We all went to the I know, but I'm just trying to figure out what was. It was at the little hotel. Oh, the hotel? Okay. I don't you talking about the small space. Yeah. I don't remember no line dance. I don't remember the you ain't care. You didn't get up and do no dance. What you talking about?

28:32It was an elder lady. I remember the lady. It was an elder lady. It was just you and the elder lady. No, it was like four other five other six, maybe six. The other room was small, young. So what? It was time to bookie room, yeah. Young, that's what I'm saying. Because the boogie woogie woogie, that's the thing. That should be the song that gets everybody to the floor because it's more communal and people remember it from their childhood. They just stop playing it.

28:52I feel, I feel you. Okay, so it can be the intro, and then you immediately change to something else just to get people together. Not immediately, young. That don't crank. The boogie woogie don't crank, yo.

29:03You can't feel it. It's electric. Boogie Woogie Woogie.

29:07No, yeah. And you know what it's fit.

29:10Boom. Uh uh. I got to the mood. Okay. Okay. I can't tell you. They just took it away.

29:22Hey, you got you got a point. They took it away. It's the electric boogie woogie woogie. I feel like that's that made me feel like it was corny, but now that I sing the whole joint.

29:31They they just completely eradicated the boogie. I'm like, dog, that's the song that is gender neutral. You know what I'm saying? Because with them fans at, you gotta be a gangster as a man to be like, yeah, I don't care. I'm out here. But I'm man's that I'm out there. Yes. I'm out there.

The Dougie by summer 2027

29:51And I'm blown about it. So if you hear if DJs, some DJs watching, yeah, bring the boogie woogie woogie back.

29:57Um, you know what? You you you you want me over, dog.

30:00Excellent. I appreciate it. Now you want me over. Okay.

30:03So now transition. We got the boogie woogie out the way.

30:06Well, how we got the boogie woogie out the way. All right. There's a dance that you don't know how to do? Is there is there a I don't know how to do the to mean dance? No, no, no. We we we over a blind dancing.

30:18I tell you this one dance that I really want to know how to do. I already know what it is. There's no way that I can get it right now, yo. Is the Dougie. I knew it. Dougie, yeah. Knew it. I knew you was coming with the Dougie. I knew you was coming with the Dougie. Dougie, young the Dougie is so cool to do, yo. Young. The Dougie looks so dope.

30:382027. Summer. Summer 2027. We Dougie. I'm Dougie. I have three Dougie tutorials saved in my phone. I have three Dougie tutorials saved in my phone. So I'm telling you, dog, summer 2027 is over for everybody. I promise you. It's over, dog.

31:05Yeah, that's over. It's over.

31:07I know my 44-year-old knees and my hips don't work the same, bro. But I'm telling you, bro, I'm on it.

31:13Yeah, the Dougie like that, young. It's like that. I can't even fake.

Baltimore club: the men who still dance

31:17It's like that. You put the little hand behind your head and then do it. Yeah, the Dougie. Like that. Am I be doing this little junk? Yes. Like that. It just be looking so smooth.

31:27The little I ain't even gonna do it right here because I can't get my my shoulders and back.

31:31Never dance is cool. What? That uh that um that Baltimore shuffle joint. Yeah, that Baltimore shuffle joint. Hold on.

31:37So we talked, we talked about a little ball, like people not dancing. I feel like the black men in Baltimore, I know they probably still dance. Yeah. I know they still dance. Yeah, because the club music. They ne they I guarantee the black men in Baltimore still dance.

31:53Yeah. They Yeah, I feel you. I I I agree. I agree. So it might be location. It might be just the DMV just think they're too cool to dance.

32:01Nah, old heads, old heads still be dancing.

32:03Nah.

32:04O heads dance. What you mean? They two-step. Nah, they be hand dancing. Spinning the girls, Chicago. I mean they be spinning them. Do you see a slew of those? Or are you just saying, just spinning them? My mother be going. My mother be going to the uh to the to the cabarets. To the cabarets, yeah. Yeah, and they be spinning them. You know what I'm saying? With the long suits. They be they be spinning them. But Baltimore, I feel like men need to if, you know, I mean, invoke the spirit of Baltimore men, yeah. When they because I remember going to college, dog, I was at Morgan. You know, growing up in PG County, you know, we don't we rarely go to Baltimore, understand the culture of Baltimore. Yeah. Dog, my freshman year when I was at Morgan, dawg, my roommate was from Baltimore. But I remember going to the club one time, you know what I'm saying? When you when you you ain't go to a black school, but stop taking shots at me every time you're gonna go.

32:56My bad. But listen. But listen, so you already know how I feel about that, dog.

33:01Yeah, I know. I don't care. You just said I had pantyholes mesh. But listen, the jump, uh, I went to the club, right? My freshman year, and you know they play Go-Go, you know what I'm saying? Yeah, you know what I'm saying? But when you listen to Go-go, you like, man, yeah, it's just a hypheness about it. And so Baltimore dudes are like, you know, they got their Baltimore stuff on, you know what I'm saying? So they like, you you know, Baltimore is Baltimore. Dog, that house music came on, dog. I'm like, I thought they was thugs. Nah. Nah, they loosen the hips. Watch out for the big girl.

33:32The partying. Uh-huh. Partying. Yeah. Partying. Ever since then. Then they got they're dead knees and and their hips and all that. Them bamers. Young. Yeah, they they they got big work out.

33:45Respect Baltimore to the to this day, cause of that, yeah. For real. Still, yeah. Baltimore 100%. Yeah, I love Baltimore. How uh with Club Music Coach.

33:55So I mean, if you just in love with dancing, why you don't dance? Like, why you don't dance a lot?

"Your wife knows every dance in the book"

34:00Like, you know what I mean? Like, why why you only why you only know like a two-step? You don't know no other dances like that. You know, and then like I so this is what I was saying. Like, your wife, first of all, your wife knows every dance in the book.

34:16Don't slice her, dog.

34:17Yeah, your wife knows every dance in the book, man. She knows. I remember when we went to the joint and when we went to y'all uh y'all renewal, y'all vial renewal. Uh uh. I watched your wife for five minutes, and she never did the same dance. She switched up dances every 15 seconds and never did the same dance, yo.

34:39She does know every dance. So look, when we was young, we said competition.

34:42And she would shit young. I don't even know why you would do it. Why would you dance that's a good one?

34:47That viral knows that young, she danced until the until it was no more left. I wanted to go. I was done. But she just kept dancing. I don't know.

34:56So why you don't like if you feel that this way, why don't you be the ringleader?

35:02Let me tell you something.

35:03You don't do that in the clubs. You don't know. Let me tell you. I'm gonna tell you why you think you're cool and you just do the two-step.

35:10Think.

35:11Yeah, you think you're cool and you just do the two steps. That's what I'm saying. You you you think you put too cool this way. You think you I'm gonna tell you this. You think you're too cool to do those other dances. No, no, no, no.

35:25I don't, my body allow me to do those dances no more. I think that you get it to a certain age. You know how old people do the But you said no more.

35:36You've never done these dances.

35:37No, no, dog. I could boogie. I could boogie, dog. If I open my hips up, that's why I've been trying to open my hips up a little bit.

35:42Yeah, but what I'm saying is you've never been in like I can do the MCM right now. The MCM right now. Right now. Chill out, yeah. I could do the MCM. Chill out, yeah. I could do the MCM. You can't even hold a box. So chill out, yeah. Chill out. Chill out. Chill out. I could do the MCM. Chill out. Right now. I'm not gonna let you do it. I'm not gonna let you do it. Chill out.

36:08But I can do the MCM. I could do the Roger Rabbit. I could do the Running Man. But what I'm saying, I can do this junk. But you never do any of those in the club.

36:14I do do that. I could do this junk. You never do any of that in the club, man. Yeah, we don't even go to the club. You never do, you never do any of that when we're at a function where dancing is is is happening. I feel like you just had the one love joint. And it was what?

36:32You want you wanna talk about Do you want you wanna do this? You sure? You wanna do this? Do you want to do this?

36:42Do you want to do this? I'm just saying, you don't know what I was doing.

36:45You right?

36:46You don't know what dances I was doing.

36:49Because you, we in the

"I need the keys so I can go sit down"

36:52having a good time, you know what I'm saying? Chilling, having a good time. You walk up to me, bruh. You walk up to me and say, word for word, this is what you say. A V I. A V I. This about to be a wild request. I said, what the? I said, what you talking about? He say VI. A VI. I need to sit down. Let me get the keys to the car so I can go sit down. Brother, so you have no idea. Oh man. Cause you was in the car. How would you bring that up? You brought it up, dog? Yeah, so don't talk to me about whether or not I was dancing or not. You right, yeah. You right. Come on, Doug.

37:44As soon as I said something, I was like, why did I say this? He's about to do that. Talking about Yon that he Yon had to sit down, yo. That was crucial.

37:54Yeah, young, you young.

37:55One love.

37:56Y'all, you keep saying you ain't old. You're not older, but that right there, dog. No.

38:03That was like an old move. No, no. So, so, so I young, you gotta take into consideration 25, 25, 62. I mean the same thing. Why are you acting like it's the same? Why are you acting like my 25, 25, 62 is the same as your 25, 25, 62?

38:21What you mean?

38:22Young, you ride on a regular Go ahead and finish. You ride on the regular, go ahead and finish. You are a cycling instructor. You know what I'm saying? You have four bikes. You know what I'm saying? You have four bikes. You ain't had to say three pair of shoes. You know what I'm saying? You got probably two helmets and 25 kits. Come on, young. I'm not, I'm not like you. I'm not like you in this cycling thing.

38:48I finished a lot of things. You ain't had to do that on.

38:51I'm just saying. So what I'm saying is 25, 25, 25 on Thursday, 25 on Friday, 62, begrudgingly. Yeah, 62. Went after that word. All right. 62 on Saturday. I was cooked. You was cooked. I was cooked. And shout out the one love. I you know, shout out the one love, but I just gotta be honest. Like, I just knew that I wasn't about to party to the reggae band. They was cranking. Young. This is what I'm saying. You don't get people. You ain't give them a chance. You didn't give them a chance because you wanted to sit down.

39:29You wanted seats. Yeah, absolutely. I went over to talk to my man. Who? My man uh Bahadi. Okay. I went over to talk to my man. Dog. You I felt like you followed me over there. You followed me over to his family, like his cut, like I guess.

39:44I sat down.

39:45You asked the table. He had the table. He was there. You don't even know cuz. I don't. You dapped him up and said, hey. Is this seat taken?

39:56He said it's for my wife, but she not here. So go ahead. You can sit down right there.

40:00Bet Young, you sat down with the family. I sat down with the family.

40:04I sat down.

40:05With his family. You sat down with his family.

40:09You would have been part of the family.

40:10Hey, and that's crazy, y'all.

40:12Yeah, whatever, yeah.

40:13That's crazy.

40:14Look, when I need a seat, I need a seat, y'all.

40:15Hey, I can tell, young, because you came to me when you came to me and was like, yo, this about to be a wild crest, y'all. And asked me for the keys,

One Love: the largest gathering of Black cyclists

40:23y'all. I said, Oh, this Bama is cooked. Yeah. Fried rice, yeah. You was straight fried rice in that jump, dog. That's it. Yeah, that was a good time, though. Shout out to One Love, young. Shout out to Mac One Love, largest gathering of black cyclists in the country every year. Yes. Super dope experience. And like it's always loves, always a good time. Uh, you know what I'm saying? We're going out, and I think I might go after the 100 mile next year. I think I'm gonna go after that.

40:47I mean, depending on where I'm at, you know what I'm saying? That's a game time decision. Yeah, yeah, no, it's all good. I'm definitely gonna do the 62. I'm not probably I'm not gonna do the 40, but you know, I it's a game time decision if I do the 100.

40:58Yeah, and so that was tight too, like the one love, because we we stayed. Shout out to my man Kellen, shout out to my man Sinclair. Yes, uh, since it was Sinclair's first time uh kind of going there. They and they Kellen has been my roommate like almost every time that I've been uh to One Love. And so we all share the Airbnb, so it was super tight. We was kind of hanging out, having these like very tight, kind of interesting conversations. Um, and I think what was dope about the conversations is that me, you, Sinclair, and Kellen, we all have had like I feel like we approached the conversation from different points, like different areas, like we we literally have very different viewpoints on particular subjects. Yeah, um, and ideas. So I think that made the conversation uh like dope because it made it rich.

41:43Yeah, and then it what made it even more dope is that

Could you be friends with a Republican?

41:47I feel like everyone was open-minded to the other person's perspective, yeah. You know what I'm saying? And they actually gave it some thought before they responded. So I I must say it was it was definitely a very like it was a dope, it was a dope weekend in general. The whole weekend was dope, yeah, and spending that was dope.

42:08And for me, yeah, the whole weekend was dope, but that that you don't often you know get the opportunity to to to be able to let everything go and just be in a situation where you can just be yourself, like, you know what I'm saying, experience new things, experience your homies in a different way. Um, but it had me to think it because we were having such such rich conversation and like disagreeing with one another and all that, I was thinking about like people who are online when there's when there's ideas or thoughts that they don't necessarily agree with, right? Um somebody who might have a different viewpoint. And I think somebody who might have a different viewpoint, I think the conversation is uh block them. You know what I'm saying? I get rid of them. What made me think, like, you know how like this like like Democrat, Republican? Do you think that you could have a Republican friend who like a Republican friend like who voted for Trump, who like extra super conservative, like could you like be friends with them?

43:07It depends on to be honest how vocally Republican he is.

43:14He or she is.

43:15He or she is. Okay. Because it just it it would it would it would irritate me. You know what I'm saying? Their stance on certain things, and I would judge them because of their stance on certain things, because of what I feel about this administration. You know what I'm saying? And I feel like if you support this administration, it's kind of like, you know, birds of a feather. So I I think it would be difficult for me to have a Republican friend in in this particular era. However, the George Bushes, um, you know what I'm saying, both of the George Bushes, I I I don't think it would have hit me as hard. Even though I feel like, you know, they're I wouldn't say simulating. Nature 'cause they nowhere near this guy but they're in the same vicinity. If that makes sense. Okay. But nah, I just I it'd be hard for me to have a Republican uh uh uh uh uh outward Republican friend in in this day and age. It'll just be difficult.

44:25Yeah, I don't think I could do it. Yeah. I don't think that I could be friends. Like it I think that that is a fundamental difference. But could I have a conversation with you? Yeah, yeah. I can well I don't know, bro. This is interesting. This is an interesting conversation because you might have had a friend who like if you had a friend for a long time and they was lean and conservative, and then they just got a little bit more on that side once you know cuz got into office.

45:15Like I said, it's more so of what they're saying than it is on what they're believing. Yeah. You know, if they believe something and they hold it within, then I don't have anything to judge because we're not having a conversation about it. I'm not seeing how to the right you are, you know what I'm saying? But if you are championing this person, if you are speaking all of their, you know, all of their language, and you're you're you're regurgitating all of their points and mindset, I I can't do it. I I wouldn't, you know, I I just couldn't do it. Just because I feel like it's saying something about how you feel about me and my people. You know what I'm saying?

46:03Yeah, that makes sense.

46:04Yeah, and it's hidden. And even if you're black, you know, it still makes me feel why you say black so hard. Even if you're black. Because I think it's a great point. Because when I say me and my people, yeah, then someone will probably say, Well, what if it's a black Republican? You know what I'm saying? But even if you're black, it it still makes me feel like you don't love my people the way that I love you.

46:24The way, yeah, nah, that makes sense. Yeah, I yeah, that that'll be tough. How about like if you

Could you marry someone from a different religion?

46:30were what about religion? Like if you were, and not not necessarily, I'm sure that you probably can have friends with somebody who's a different religion, but what if you what about like marriage? Could you think you you think you could marry somebody from a different religion?

46:46I think that's more possible. Because I think all religion, besides like satanic type of religions, I think all religions are ultimately trying to make a good person out of that.

46:59Well, here's the thing though, but it they're also religious, there's ritual, right? Like there's like if you're Christian, you're saved, if you are Islamic, you might go to the mosque. Uh, and there's also like you know, the the the the belief or who you believe God to be kind of move through.

47:19Yeah.

47:20And what would you do about that?

47:23I think it would be difficult. I think it'll be extremely difficult. And it'll be a tough conversation. Um but I do think that it could potentially exist because I think whether you go to the mosque or whether you go to the church or whether you go to whatever synagogue or like they're all trying the their goal is for you to be a good person.

47:48Okay.

47:49I mean but I think the complication comes in when like you have a child. You know what I'm saying? And now it's okay, what religion are we teaching this or are we pushing this child in? Yeah. You know, um uh yeah, things like that. Uh you know, we believe in yeah, yeah.

48:08Yeah, I think the ritual, the the the rituals of religion will, you know, create a level of uh, I guess, difference and some some very real conversations to be had, especially if you are like super that thing. Religious like, you know what I'm saying? Like, you know, the way, the only way, or you believe that like, oh nah, you know.

48:36I don't wanna I don't wanna I don't wanna sound like optimistic. Yeah. Because I'm not optimistic about it. Yeah. I'm just saying that I think that I would it'll be easier to do than to have uh outwardly Republican friend in this day and age. Okay. That's all I'm saying. That you think it, yeah, yeah. It'll be easier, but it will still be extremely difficult. Difficult. Yeah. Yeah, I think so too. Because I don't feel like that person hates me. I feel I don't feel like that, you know what I'm saying?

49:08Yeah, that's it, that's it, that's it, you know, interesting point.

49:12Yeah, could there be benefits to it?

49:18Maybe. Um I don't know. Do you see benefits to it? I think uh I think we get to learn both religions. We get to learn a history.

49:32I think if you are yeah, I think if you truly sit and you believe well ultimately there's there's no need to defend it. Right? I think that there is it just is. And I think the benefit is I remember in college I wrote a paper on I compared and contrast to Hinduism, Buddhism, and Confucianism. And I remember this like kind of this paper opening me up a little bit around like the that they were all literally saying, like to me after saying the same thing. And I think that the benefit is of like exposure and the ability to be able to receive all of these different lessons and and and and valuing the lessons in it all. I think the benefit, if you are mature enough and believe and like sit in your stance, because I think that like how we engage with our friends, like we don't necessarily wear your religion on your sleeve, it's just part of you. Yeah, right. If it kind of makes up how you move through the world, whether it's spirituality or however you move. And I think it's the same way if you're raising a child, like it literally should just move through you. Yeah, and so I think that this benefits because you I'm I'm thinking that your community or your child or whoever you're around kind of sees how you interact with the world and might see your mother act in a or your father acting in a particular way, and I think that it exposes you know, exp and and have

Praying over food and respecting other rituals

51:00your child be a little bit more aware, and I also think that it creates a level of understanding for you as well. Yeah, yeah. So yeah, because I feel like that I had that, I've actually had that experience, you know, like I because I grew up, you know, the way in which I was raised, the culture in which I was raised in was very different from Christianity, and you know, to kind of be with me, especially when I was a lot younger, uh, was you know, I had thoughts and ideas about the world based on how I was raised.

51:29You know what's interesting, you know what I'm saying? Is that I mean, I don't think we've ever really talked about religion like in in depth. But I remember when like I I would think uh about prayer when like I'm praying over my food. I would I would think about like sh should I ask him to pray?

51:54Oh yeah.

51:55You know what I'm saying? Like it was a complicated joint. Like, do do they do he pray? You know what I'm saying?

52:00Yeah. Do you pray over your food? I pray. I I I I when I don't rem I don't be thinking to pray over my food all the time. That's why when you be praying over your food, I'd be like, yeah, pray for me, dog.

52:11Yes, I I'll pray over your food for you.

52:13Oh no, no, no. Like, nah, so praying wasn't necessarily normed. Like, but yeah, man, like, yeah, we I always want to talk to the talk to the creator. Okay. 100%. That but that's crazy that you feel like I you whether or not you should pray over the food. I I am, I was uh, you know, being a I respect all cultures, religions, like I I just have such a huge respect for, but there's certain things that I won't engage in. Like especially, I mean, we talked about this before, like rituals, like I'm I'm not gonna engage in like rich ritualistic things. Like um uh like eating Jesus. Like I'm not I'm not doing that. You know what I'm saying? I'm not doing that, dog. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, I'm not doing that. I'm not calling Jesus. Yeah, it's wild. It definitely is, and that's be tripping me out, though. Bahamas be acting like uh witchcraft, and don't be doing, you know, you know, religion, certain religions be like, don't do that. I'm like, dog, yeah, it's just your blood of blood, like, but I digress. I digress, and it's also like I just won't engage in those type of things as it relates to like you ain't I ain't gonna wear no yarmulca or nothing like that. You know what I'm saying? I ain't gonna wear the little things, the little cords.

53:28Oh, okay.

53:28The Jewish cord, the little Jewish jumps, the little cords. I'm not gonna pat a little curl coming down. The little shirt. I guess that's more cultural than ri than ritual, but yeah, I'm not doing that. You know what I'm saying? I got you. Yeah, yeah. But you know, it's interesting, man. Interesting to say the least. You know what I'm saying? That's all part of it. You know, but you can pray for me, dog. You know what I'm saying? Matter of fact, you should. But that's been the the funny part is is like this this you know, blackness. I think

Black people are not a monolith: your favorite type of Black person

53:54that speaks to this idea, like blackness not necessarily being a monolith. We you good, yeah. I'm just oh I cause it's like I think we preach and push over I'm gonna be careful with this this next question. But we push a lot of times. We talk about this idea, like, um black people, we vary, and we should not we shouldn't be typecasted, and we not just one type of person, or this one group, you know what I'm saying? We all these different things, and I I I and I believe that we black people are the most diverse people on the planet black men, black women, black children. You know, but we went to uh House in the Park when we was at in Atlanta for one love. We was at House in a Park, and House in the Park, it is eclectic out there, it's super eclectic.

54:47It's it's and just just yeah, it's it's eclectic.

54:52Right? It made me think around that the eclectic nature of all of it, and there were so many different types of black people there. Yes, you know what I'm saying, like at this at the joint, and I was thinking, like, what do you have groups of black people that are your favorite? Do you got like favorite types of black people?

55:18I do, I think I do have favorite types of black people. Yeah, I think my favorite type of black person is a person who is hold on, before you say that.

55:31Okay, before you say that, we having this conversation because we black. We can have this conversation. But if you are another color and you see this color, and you see this clip, you cannot engage. Participate. You can't participate, you just step to the sideline. Yeah, this is this is black privilege right here. Like, go so go ahead.

55:55So, yeah, I think my favorite type of black person is one that is uh quirky in a sense, like one that is not mainstream, and they're so comfortable in being who they are. Because it just it shows me a sense of bravery and a sense of freedom. You know what I'm saying? Like it's this dude that I went to school with, and you you are even part of this. This is dude that I went to school with, his name is Chris Lasseter. Um He's one of the greatest, greatest kids, greatest dudes that I've ever met. You know what I'm saying? He's just very uh I his soul is just just but he's different. Like he's super different. Like he laughs at he laughs extremely loud and he can't stop his laughter. Like if something's funny, he's just gonna break out laughing. And he laughs at the craziest things, his memory is A1, he remembers all of these stories. Uh when we were in college, he was a straight Bahama, like he wore the Reeboks and you know the Reebok classics, but it was the suede joints, and he had them in all different colors, and he had a sweatsuit to go with it. You know what I'm saying? Okay, I like this guy. Yeah, yeah. But he but and he was uh, if I'm not mistaken, he was a virgin in college. Or no, I don't think he was a virgin, but he just wasn't partaking in in you know what I'm saying, sexual activity. Yeah, he wouldn't cuss, but he was a straight hip-hop fan. Okay, so he would he would censor himself when saying raps. Like he would actually say, da da da da. Like he would actually censor himself. But Chris is like just a different dude, man. And he just I find him to be so interesting. And you, like, even you, like the fact that you go against social norms, or when I first met you, you know what I'm saying? You was going against social norms. And it made me feel like you was just so comfortable with yourself, you know what I'm saying? And it showed a sense of bravery.

57:57Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. Hold on, yeah. Hold on, dog, hold on, hold on, time out, be easy. Going against social norms, what are you talking about?

58:11Okay, like you're comfortable in for instance, if if I come from a background, or if I'm come from where it's cool to smoke, and it's cool to drink, and it's cool to to be like, you know, to hide your feelings and you know, not not communicating and all of that type of stuff, like you were you were different. It wasn't a lot of people like you during in uh at up and up that I dealt with. Now maybe it's different for you. Maybe you've experienced them on so many levels, but as for me, I didn't. And then the fact that you were just so confident in it, like you was like, look, I don't do this. I just don't do this, and that's what it is.

58:55I I take I take I take that without argument. I take that.

58:59And you and you just you know you wear you still you still wear bikini, bikini thongs, like bikini, um what the bikini bikini, but let me bikini sandals.

59:09You still wear bikini sandals, and I mean I'm saying I wear, I wear, I wear them, you know what I'm saying? My feet out. I don't care nothing about none of that. Like you know what I'm saying? You gotta liberate your toes, bruh. I feel like men, they be lunching, like you know what I'm saying? It's the reason why sisters wanna wear their toes out. It's freedom, bruh. It's freedom in the summertime. So why wouldn't men have had your toes out? Like, how did you liberate the toes, bruh? So yeah, I won't, I don't got no, I don't have no thong jumps no more. I don't have I don't away.

59:37You thumb away.

59:38Now those only shower shoes. I've upgraded my.

59:40I've seen them out in the street. No, I've you seen them in the yeah, you seen them in the past. I'm shower shoes if I see them, what I'm telling you is I'm gonna look like April shoes.

59:49My toes are still out. I just upgraded the Birkin stocks. Like so my burger, but you know, I but the Birken stock got the separate big toe. Yeah, yeah, but there's an elite level that I'm trying to get to. I'm trying to get to the elite level of where I'm trying to style them right though, because I want to wear my Burger stocks out in this. I normally just wear my Burgen stocks when I'm on vacation for real. Yeah, but I want to wear my burger stocks like, you know what I'm saying?

1:00:10Jusky them joints.

1:00:11Yeah, I'm trying, I'm trying to get to another level, but

Older Black women are top of the line

1:00:14I think that's the 2027, summer 2027, you know what I'm saying?

1:00:17Summer 2027, you're gonna see Vic with some uh some super burgen stocks doing the Dougie.

1:00:23100%. That's that's the goal. You know what I'm saying? But my core man, my my favorite type black person, young, is I got a lot. I got a lot.

1:00:33You gotta name your top, yeah.

1:00:34Okay, I'll name my top. One older older black women. Older black women, old older black women culture is like top of the line. They kid, they like they sweet, and they can be angry, yes, and they can be like warm, yes, and they can't that nobody's gonna take care of you like an older black woman, though.

1:00:56And they can do all of that in one minute. In one minute. In one minute. They can do it all in one minute.

1:01:02All in one minute, young black woman, olderly black women, young my favorite group of yes, young, and Bama's not violent. They did not not like you know, like this. I like black people who do not follow the norms. So, like, so like the overly, not overly, I don't know if it's overly, but like rough around the edges and will say exactly what they feel. Like, boom, the the brother uh who we went to Waffle House. The brother you was talking to at Waffle House. Yeah, yeah.

1:01:37Him. What's his name? I know he's talking about play football.

1:01:40We were having a regular conversation. He heard the conversation, he was like, What you talking about? Nah, dog me, blah blah blah blah. Like, like, yeah, I want to get in it. It sounds like a little aggressive, but he's chillin'. He's having a good time. He ain't following those quote unquote social norms. Those type of dudes. Yeah, you you you you actually talk to him. Yeah, I didn't get the opportunity to talk to him.

1:02:00But like it was cool, man.

1:02:01Yeah, youngers who don't follow the social norms, yeah. Like tight, tight, skateboard.

1:02:07So I think that so I think that that's that's similar. I think you're describing what I'm saying. Yeah. Like, I don't think you follow the social norms. Chris definitely doesn't follow the social norms. Um, just people that I run into that I'm really fond of,

How would people describe you? (the roast)

1:02:20they don't follow the social norms.

1:02:21Yeah, but so I think that's tight y'all around because of course, but here's the question though. This this idea, this now I know, let me preface this. I know that like we are not a monolith, we don't all just fit into particular categories because that's the beauty of blackness, like we can move in and out of the ways in which people think about us.

1:02:42But the question is if someone were uh oh I don't like the way you look, dog.

1:02:51The the little face you made, yeah, but here's if someone were to describe like oh young, who is that? Like, nah, it's black. It's like, oh no, you don't know black. Black is such and such. How would people describe you to someone who is trying to recognize who you are? What what what are they gonna say? See, I this is difficult.

1:03:18This is difficult because like this is difficult because I feel like if I try to describe myself, I get rid of humility.

1:03:30Yes, go ahead. Let's do it.

1:03:32Nah, no, let's do it.

1:03:33That makes me feel uncomfortable. Let's jump, let's jump into this. That makes me feel uncomfortable. Hey, listen, let's I want to know what the people will say to you, say about you when it's like time. Like, what how are they gonna describe you? Nah, you don't know black.

1:03:47Black is black is uh I think the main thing is creative. Black is creative.

1:03:56Timeout.

1:03:57Yeah.

1:03:59I don't think I'm telling me the right way. You telling me I don't think somebody I'm describing like you don't know black dog, and nah, black. He creative. That's how they're gonna say it. Are you talking about like physical?

1:04:11I'm talking about if somebody, like if you say you go first, then you can help me up.

1:04:17You can help me up with how what you trying to get me to say. So I think the Bama's gonna say me like Vic. Uh cuz who used to uh own, cuz who used to own Smizzy. So we talking about the thing. No, I'm not done.

1:04:32Okay.

1:04:33And then like he gonna say, yeah, uh cuz who uh what they gonna say? Brown skin cuz? No. Mobilehead cuz, bumble niggas got the little bed with the like bubble head cuz. What like what else would they booty?

1:04:50I'm just trying, I'm I'm I'm just I'm gonna be like, you know, uh black, yeah, but the dread. The dude with uh the dude with mambo stones. Oh uh remember the dude that married his wife in the same day. He be making them uh command the song joint. Oh, you know what I'm saying? Um the dude, um, what else he doing? What else I say the man? He got great in his business, grain his still gotta hairline. Somebody like it like thirty-five. Yeah, we be doing the uh we be doing the burger ball. What the other do? What the yellow yeah, yeah, what the other do? What the other do? I think um used the oh spizzy, he gotta like uh, you know, like some brothers, some brothers and and and sisters, and all of them named like as it is, like his name, I can't remember his name is, but just think of a nigga the whole family what his name like glorious.

1:07:06Oh my god, dog.

1:07:08You a Bama for that. Nah, but that's funny. That's a funny joint, though. The thinking about like I think it like

How would your child describe you?

1:07:14really brings some some degree of awareness to you. Like, like, yeah, how would Bamas describe you?

1:07:19So, like what how are you, how do you think you showing up in the world?

1:07:22Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I you know, it's interesting. Cause I think. I wonder, y'all would it change? What you mean? If it's just if it's your child. What you mean? Like, how would your child describe you to someone else? Hmm. That's a great question. Yeah. That's a great question to ask your child. He's a Bama. I know my son. He's gonna go hard on me.

1:07:49You say that. I mean I under I But still like he's a good idea.

1:07:52If you're serious, if you're serious, he is not that's not what it is. I wonder though, that's that's an interesting joint. Like, how would your child or somebody who or your parents?

1:08:05I think parents are sise it though.

1:08:07And I'm sliced about that.

1:08:09Okay.

1:08:09I will say this. I think that as a man, the man that I am, I thought I think about that often. Like I feel like I measure my success based on like I feel like my parents are proud of me. You know what I'm saying? And that is, and I know that they would describe me in a way that is like exposes the light my light.

Are your parents proud of you?

1:08:37You know what I'm saying? And I that is wanna be, you know what I'm saying? Like that's a a testament to them. You know what I'm saying? And I can only imagine, well, I know what it feels like because I'm I'm the same way with my son. Like I'm super proud of him. And so I think that, you know, my parents, my mom, my dad would sciss me out of the frame. But you're not gonna do that.

1:09:01Do you feel like nah? I don't I mean, I think my mother, but you know, I don't think that I think my mother is is proud of me. Yeah. Um but I just in my adult life, like my mother, she passed away in 2004. Yeah. So it's been a minute. Um my father, I mean, yes, I don't want to act like it wouldn't matter. It would matter if he told me he was proud of me. But we didn't have that kind of relationship, so I think majority of it is more so about my kids. You know what I'm saying? Like, but then their proudness is I think it's shallow, if that makes sense. Like my child could be proud of me because I get them stuff. You know what I'm saying? Or I spend time with them. And not to say that that is insignificant, but your parents have seen you over the years. They've seen you develop, they've seen you overcome, you know what I'm saying? They've seen you just go through all of these different phases. So when they say they're proud of you, it is totally different than a child saying they're proud of you.

1:10:15I yo, you know what's funny is I think that a parent has a different vested interest in you. Yeah. Like, but you know, when you when you speak of that, I think that my my son being proud of me, I think, means more. Will hit me a little bit different because but I they they they experience you. They experience all of you. You can't even be, you know, I feel like with your parents, because there's a level of respect that you have to have for your parents. So they give they get a little bit more of your protected side, more so than your children, right? And I think that your children can get get all of you because I don't know, I don't know if your children get all of you.

1:11:03I still think that there's certain things that you you you may shield from.

1:11:07But what I'm saying is I think that you have the ability to like so for example, when you get angry, right? You can express your anger to your child. It is it is culture, like with your parents, we can't, especially when you were a kid, and even as an adult, you always are trying to figure out how to make sure that you show the utmost respect. Yeah, but a child, you literally have to be a full human being and be like, okay, I'm gonna reserve this and I'm gonna express my my disappointment or my anger in this way rather than and I think that ultimately dictates how your child sees you or how they will describe you.

1:11:39I got you.

1:11:39That makes sense.

1:11:40That makes sense.

1:11:41But that's a that's a that's a that's a interesting point. Yeah.

1:11:47All of it.

1:11:48Are the people who are most invested in a love for you proud of you? And does it matter to you?

1:11:54It definitely matters.

1:11:55It definitely matters to me.

1:11:57Yeah, it definitely matters.

1:11:58It definitely matters to me, though.

1:12:01I feel like like if it if it I feel like it has to matter.

1:12:09I think

"People mask their feelings by rejecting them"

1:12:10it doesn't matter to a lot of people though. Like whether or not your parents are proud of you, whether or not you're parents.

1:12:16I don't think I don't believe that that's true. I think that they say that, but I don't necessarily believe that it's true. Yeah. I don't I don't think that it's true that they feel that way. Like I I think that a lot of people mass their feelings by rejecting them.

1:12:33That's a powerful point. Mass your feelings by rejecting them. I think it's a powerful point. Like when people say often, like, I don't uh I don't care what people think, I don't care what they think. That's yeah, that's that's not you do care.

1:12:44Yeah, because in care book. Yeah, yeah, he made a valid point.

1:12:48Yeah, we're gonna have to spend a whole episode about that. Yeah, like yeah, we're gonna have to spend a whole because I I finished reading his book, um, and I really want to break down like a have a conversation. Yeah, but but it in the meantime, shout out to him. Shout out to Kier Gaines. That book, it all starts when you do, is an amazing uh

Let's Argue: a sexual bucket list that doesn't include you

1:13:10contribution to the canon of black of black authors. Yeah, you know what I'm saying? And it's gonna stand the test of time for a minute. So, like, good, good, great job on that book, brother. Great job. Yes, sir. All right, you ready to argue, bro?

1:13:22Let's go.

1:13:23All right, all right, all right, all right, you go first, you know what I'm saying? But those as he's picking a car, let's argue is the opposite segment of the show where uh he reads the car, the person who's getting the car read to them gets to select a stance, and no matter where the person who's reading the car, it doesn't matter. They have to choose the opposite stance and then defend it.

1:13:45I don't understand how we do this one. Okay. I'm just being honest. Maybe you can help before you pick the stance. Okay. What are signs a man is a fuckboy?

1:14:00Let's pick something else. Yeah. Because I don't I don't like that.

1:14:05Yeah, it actually goes against what we said before.

1:14:11I want everybody, all man.

1:14:13You know, this is crazy, because then this one comes. What does that say? This is the the the opposite of that. What does that say? What are signs a woman belongs to the streets? Not doing that either. It's not happening. A woman tells her man she wants to check things off her sexual bucket list, but his list doesn't include her. Is that honesty or disrespect?

1:14:43That's honesty. That's honesty, it's not disrespect. Like if you if you if you ask me what's on my bucket list and you ask me what I want to do, and you don't necessarily want to do those particular things with her, just just because just because a person is your girl doesn't mean that they are your like they can fulfill all of your needs and or desires. And it's a bucket list, it doesn't necessarily mean that there's something that has to be done. But if you want that person to be honest, like how is my honesty disrespect when I'm not attacking you? Disrespect is something now you can feel disrespect, you can feel hurt, right, by my whatever my bucket list is. Um, but I'm not responsible for your feelings. Um, but I am responsible for helping, you know, clarifying all these other things. But nah, dog, like if I that's part of my bucket list, um I we really tapped in and locked in, dog. Let me let me tell you what the bucket list is, and if it don't include you, hey, you have to manage that.

1:15:46I so my point is it's a sexual bucket list, which means that it's not just one or two things on it, it's a plethora of things on it. And you telling me that your partner isn't on the list at all, that has to be disrespectful. Now it can be one of 99, you know, one of a thousand, but if they're not on it at all, you really don't want to be with that person. Like, so you're not being honest, you're not telling the person, hey, I just don't want to be with you. I want to sexually want to be with somebody else. If they're not on the bucket list at all, like you want to be in the Mauha Club. And say you want to be in the Mauha Club, you wanna be in the Mauha Club with somebody else, or will it suffice to be in the Mount Hot Club with her? Listen, you can't you can't come back. You can't come back with the city. We can keep going back and forth. Alright, cool. We can. I don't have a problem with it, but I'm just saying, this is gonna this is how it's gonna go from this point on.

1:16:40Nah, we good. I ain't even feeling it. You sure? Yeah, I'm not doing that with you, dog. Yeah, all right, yeah.

1:16:44What about what? I said, alright.

1:16:46Nah, you don't.

1:16:47Yeah, alright. That's what I said. You can feel how you want to feel, dog.

1:16:53You ain't gonna bait me. I ain't gonna let you bait me, dog.

Let's Argue: is patriarchy good or bad for society?

1:16:57You know what I'm saying? It's all good. I ain't gonna let you bait me. You think you go hard, but you don't. Let me see here. Boom. It's uh is patriarchy good or bad for society?

1:17:21Patriarchy is ooh, you are going to be pissed. The patriarchy is terrible for society. Patriarchy is why we have all of the issues that we have in America in general, is what I think. And not just America, but in in general. I think that the man and woman relationship uh isn't as strong as it could be because of patriarchy. I think that I mean ultimately it's just it's it's I don't think it's good. I don't think it's good. Jesus Christ. What you gotta say?

1:18:06I mean, when you think about patriarchy, and when you like actually analyze what it is, is this idea that like is this over-examination or like this over focus on on men setting the norm and or the standard for how the world should be run, right? And you know, though I think like um, you know, this conversation when I think like it could matriarchy be good, right? And I'm like, yeah, matriarchy could be, you know, I'm saying a very good thing for society if women rule or created the norms and the standards of how society could be run when used in uh in the appropriate way and when when and when done responsibly. And I think the same thing for patriarchy, like when when there's a sense of responsibility attached to how you are, and it doesn't mean that we don't take insight, like if we were running things from a matriarchal standpoint, it doesn't mean that we don't take insight from men. And if we run anything from a patriarchal standpoint, it doesn't mean that we take we don't double dip. Hold on, ho, ho, ho, ho. Let me finish like you let me finish my like you're disrespecting me, dog. You disrespecting me, dog. Let me finish like you're when you finish when you when you when you have that, like you know, so patriarchy could be good for society, you know what I'm saying? When when used in an appropriate and responsible way, you double dipping. You're double dipping. You a hater that I figured that out. You a hater, dog, don't you hater dog? I argue, I made it, I talked about one side, clarify the other side. You but you're not gonna do no. You I just did that. It was a masterclass, and you so mad that

Book rec: Octavia Butler, Mind of My Mind

1:19:42I was able to put out kind of like a bigot. Nah, but I was kinda like a bigot that you mad at me. No, don't be mad at the fact that I created that, bruh. Like you mad at me because I did what I just did, dog. Like I can't even, you know what I'm saying? Yeah, I see how you're it is what it is, bro. So I wanna talk about this uh Octavia Butler. First, and let me just just talk about Octavia Butler. Octavia Butler is one of the most amazing sci-fi writers ever. Sapphire. Yeah, like bruh. I didn't know you read Sapphire, yeah. So I've read Kendrit. This is my second, I was at a uh at a house party, and this brother recommended this book, Mind of My Mind. Uh, and I posted it online on my stories, and everybody like started responding to me, like, yo, this book is bruh. When I tell you, this junk got me lunching. And I know I need to watch some YouTube videos or something on it, but mind of my mind, even if you're not into like sci-fi, if it's not like your thing, like I would just for the entertainment value, and and I know that it's it's about to move to some lessons and some bigger like ideas about the world around like racism and around like sexism. I know that this is still coming up because it's really about like like people, like this this brother is breeding telepaths, like people who can read other people's minds, but it's like a black woman is the main character, and she was forced to marry like a white man who's a telepath, but she's like turning into like a super telepath, which she where she actually owns this white man's mind, like he knows what like young. This junk is like crazy, bruh, bruh. So this is what I'm on right now, Octavia Butler. You can grab any of Octavia Butler's books. Um, I also read Kendra. There's a like a short series on like Kendred too. But check Octavia Butler out. She's amazing.

1:21:35It's dope, man. Yeah, man. Black Matoys podcast. We back at it. Yeah, play the music. Play the music.